She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize