I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
