y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
