I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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