Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
