Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
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