ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
