So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Randomize
