I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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