Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
