i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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