i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
