He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize