im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
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