I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
