ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
