That's when you crack a 10am beer
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize