i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Houston, we have a blender
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
