Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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