Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Randomize