He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Houston, we have a squirter
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
