Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
