I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Randomize
