sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
