i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
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