But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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