One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I am available for nakedness
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Randomize
