beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
