In the future we'll all be gay
if i can run in heels then i can drive
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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