Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
