She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Sorry my hands just texted you
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
