he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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