everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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