I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
