just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Did you pee in the oven last night??
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
