Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
