i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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