Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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