drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
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I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
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My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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