My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize