Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I'm both gender and math confused
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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