Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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