hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
