one word: firstdatebathroomanal
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
