How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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