who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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