Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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