This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
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