well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
someone owes me an orgasm
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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