Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I deserve this hangover.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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