There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize
